What outcome are you trying to control?

Luna under the stairwell, 6 months old.

At 6 months old, my dog “Luna” was a stray wandering the streets of Sacramento on her own. One day, she stumbled upon a homeless guy in Oak Park who was epileptic and having a seizure and she stayed near him and licked him until the seizure ended. She followed him around for the rest of the day and although he enjoyed her company he knew he couldn’t take care of her, so he found a rope and tied her to the back of a stairwell in an apartment complex and sat across the street contemplating what to do with her. (I know this because a few months later he approached us and told me the story.) That stairwell led to my apartment door.

I was out of town at the time, but just a few days prior I told a neighbor I was ready to adopt a dog and that I preferred bully breeds. When he offered to go to the pound with me to look for one I said, “No, dogs tend to find me.”

When my neighbor came home that day he saw sweet Luna curled up in the bushes underneath the stairwell, and after confirming she didn’t belong to anyone he called me and said, “I think your dog found you.” I sent my brother to collect her and the rest is history.

Now Luna is 6 years old and 30 pounds heavier. She sleeps wrapped up in a down comforter and eats fresh meat and vegetables every night, and spends her days loafing in the sun while living with a hopelessly devoted human companion.

Luna at home, 6 years old.

Life turned out pretty well for Luna and in some ways, other than being innately sweet and loving, she had nothing to do with it. Knowing her, I imagine that if she ended up in a situation that wasn’t working for her she would’ve figured a way out of it. Perhaps that's how she ended up on the street in the first place.

I think about Luna’s story a lot and use it as a reminder to practice having a little more trust in the path that life has laid out for me. I spend a lot of time worrying about my future and trying to do everything I can to control its outcome, but rarely have things turned out the way I expected them to. In retrospect, instead of trying to force a particular outcome, I could’ve spared myself a lot of time and energy by having a little trust.

Luna doesn’t question whether she is worth the love and good fortune she receives. The concept of “deserving” is totally lost on her. She gets to have good things just because. As author Devon Price says, “Animals help teach us that we shouldn’t have to earn our right to exist. We're fine and beautiful and completely lovable when we're sitting on the couch just breathing.”

Is there an outcome that you are trying to control? How does it feel to hold control in your body?

Take a few deep breaths and as you exhale practice letting go of that grip.

What would it feel like to have trust that you will be OK? What would it feel like to trust that you will know how to care for yourself no matter what the outcome?